1. That time when I accidentally superglued my butt to the top of my desk.
2. That time when I had to go so so bad that I took a dump out of the back of a deuce-and-a-half while stuck in a traffic jam in Seoul.1
3. The night that I was so drunk that I was basically yelling the theme song to “Mission Impossible” and diving behind stuff and into things…like trashcans.
4. My 20’s.
5. The 1980’s.2
1. I just realized how funny it is to refer to the truck as a “deuce and a half” — especially considering that after two weeks of MREs, the resulting log was the size of a baby’s arm.
2. I can’t believe that actually happened.